Are you struggling with growing your business? Do you find it hard to build professional (or personal) relationships in your life and have a hard time connecting with others? Are you struggling to find happiness and relying on others for joy and happiness that being by yourself makes you feel sad? Learning to be happy by yourself is one of the reasons that people talk about establishing self-care rituals and why talks and discussions about self-care have increased in recent months.
Establishing Great Relationships and Connections
Engaging in self-care practices is not just about being happy but it is also about helping you work on yourself. We can all agree that building a connection with someone is the key to any great relationship and when you have good, supportive relationships with the people around you, you feel content. Professionally, if your clients feel they cannot connect with you, you may have a hard time with client retention just like if you don’t “connect” or like with what a store offers, you probably wouldn’t keep shopping there.
What is not known is that in order for you to be able to build those great connections with others that satisfy your soul, you must first be able to connect with yourself, understand yourself and be happy with yourself – know what works for you and what doesn’t, what makes you feel good, what feels real and authentic to you and what doesn’t resonate with you, and, identify the people that make you feel good and should be part of your life and the ones that “dampen” your energy field. Once you are content with yourself, you can attract great people into your life whether it be as friends or attracting the types of clients you want to work with.
That #1 Thing: Working On Yourself
Working on yourself IS HARD and requires dedication but personal development is something everyone should spend time doing. This is especially so when things fall apart when we may choose to seek external help – counselors, self-help books, astrologers- which is great as it can help drive you down the right path but you also have to be willing to do the work yourself and listen to your own inner voice. Only you know what is right for you so start tapping into your own intuitive abilities.
If you dedicate time to working on yourself every day or at least 3 times per week in today’s on-the-go society, you will see rewards – you will get a clearer vision of what you want your career to look like, what kind of clients you want to attract and where you want your business to take you if you are an entrepreneur. You also attract the right type of people in your life that help you climb that success ladder.
So next time you find yourself pushing to achieve success in your work but keep hitting a wall or you are doing tried and tested methods of marketing that others have said over and over again have worked tremendously well for them but for some reason, it just isn’t working for you, then I recommend taking a step back and spending some time to slow down and work more on personal development and “figure yourself out”. There may be people ahead of you but that is okay, everyone has their own pace. Maybe they were in your shoes a couple of years ago and that is when they spent time on themselves.
How Hard Is It? I will let you in on a little secret – It took me approximately TWO years to feel fully content with myself. About 4 years ago, I went through a time in my life when things just felt like they were falling apart and I was about to graduate and leave the one place I actually felt good going to (Yes, that was my naturopathic medical school). I felt lost and confused and for the first time, agreed to speak to an astrologer. That’s where I got the guidance I needed to move to the other side of this country. I also knew that with everything I had gone through, I had some things I wanted to work on within myself so moving somewhere I can live that single, independent life was exactly what I needed to just be by myself and work on myself on a personal level. A key reason I had to turn down a “text message proposal” the day before I was embarking on my one-way flight from Toronto to Calgary. What I didn’t know was that it would take years. There were times of frustration when I realized I was way behind in my career compared to some of my colleagues who I graduated with but now looking back and trying to analyze what the best marketing strategy was that really grew my business over the last year, I’d have to say it would be taking time to invest in myself and doing A LOT of personal development work rather than constantly posting on social media and trying to build my followers.
Build the best relationship with yourself first because you are the longest commitment you will ever experience in your life.
8 Strategies to Working On Yourself and Personal Development
Seek guidance and advice from professionals. Working on yourself doesn’t mean you have to do it all alone. It is ok to seek help from a healthcare professional … even perhaps astrologers and clairvoyants. Seek guidance but don’t feel like you have to implement everything you are being told – figure out what works for you. A good healthcare professional that takes the time to listen to you will make recommendations that fit your lifestyle. If you talk to an astrologer, know that what they tell you can be modified by actions you take in your life. A good astrologer will tell you the bigger picture but will not tell you the steps on how to get there so that you can still experience adventure and excitement in life as you try out new ways, explore new things and learn about yourself while working on getting to a “destination”.
Figure out what you like doing and DO those things … even if it is alone! You will make new friends. You don’t always need a friend to accompany you to something you want to do. Join a dance group or a sports team for example – whatever makes you happy.
Spend time alone. Yes, that might mean forcing yourself to stay in on a Saturday night and read a book or write in a journal instead of going out. Sometimes, you will even notice that this is what your mind and soul wants to do. Go traveling, go shopping and go explore a new city by yourself. Alone time is great because it lets you think about ways to expand your business as well. Being alone is what you need to do to tap into your intuition and enhance your intuitive abilities.
Do things that take you out of your comfort zone because as everyone has always said, you learn the most about yourself when you are outside your comfort zone. This could be moving to another city or traveling the world. Pushing yourself out of your zone can be scary but it builds your confidence, lets you learn what you like and you don’t like to do, enables you to push yourself and meet new people, and most importantly, gives you challenges – which are the best for learning about yourself. I am not saying you have to be crazy like me and move to a completely different city away from your family but if that is what you need, then go for it.
Explore your creative outlets – find out what your best ways to express yourself are. You might find a new talent or figure out something that you can translate and use in your career. Doing a creative project – painting, drawing, dancing, playing an instrument – is a great way to release your emotions and express your feelings.
Read books on personal growth and development – but always question the advice the books are telling you and only listen if it is something that truly resonates with you.
If you are single, sometimes it means taking a break from long-term relationships. You will have people in your life telling you that it is time to find someone but really the only person that knows when you are ready for a relationship is you – your inner voice will tell you. Feel free to go on dates … actually go on dates (but if that’s what you want, then you don’t have to date) … live those experiences, meet and talk to different potential people because each one will only teach you something about yourself you may not have known. Just don’t plan on committing until you feel good about yourself – your gut will know when you are at this point. If you keep having one bad date after another, take that as a sign that maybe there is something about yourself you should explore.
Eat healthy and take the right supplements if you need to so you can support healthy neurotransmitter balance and hormone balance which helps to uplift your emotions and mood – this will help you enjoy the process of working on yourself without feeling depressed and anxious. Speaking to a naturopathic doctor can help guide you in the right path in this area and we can run functional laboratory testing that gives you a comprehensive look at your hormone levels and if you need support to boost the calming neurotransmitter “GABA” or the happy neurotransmitter “serotonin”.
While personal development is a lifelong task as we are always evolving, you will know when your efforts have paid off as you will naturally start to radiate happiness, confidence, can sell your services without hesitation, can sell YOURSELF and thus, you will be better ready to attract abundance and what you want into your life. You will see the shift in your career and life. Trust me, the universe somehow secretly knows when you are ready because it will start manifesting all your intentions.
I leave you with a quote I recently heard on a podcast from the Basic Bananas Bunch “People who work on themselves, also grow their companies. You have to invest in yourself first and foremost before you can invest in your business and anyone else.”
Some of the ways I help you make working on yourself more enjoyable include:
Improving mental well-being by balancing hormones (thyroid, estrogen, testosterone, progesterone, cortisol) and neurotransmitters so you do not start to feel anxious and depressed when you spend time alone
Helping you achieve balance in all areas of your life
Addressing any other health issues that are preventing you from doing things you want to do